• coralsea

    This drives me nuts.  My sister and brother-in-law homeschooled their kids in Alaska, far from “bad” influences, using one of the nuttier Christian-based curriculums (note: not all are nutty; I am branding this one nutty because it talks about how people used to live with dinosaurs.  Nuff said).


    They married off the two older girls, one to a guy the girl didn’t really like, although he did “let” her finish college, because the guy basically told my brother-in-law, all “man-to-man-like,” that was worried that waiting much longer could adversely impact their “purity.”  In other words, the guy was horny.  The second daughter was married off in much the same way.   She basically asks her husband for permission to talk on the phone, use the computer, etc., because “he wants to make sure what I do is okay.”  Apparently, negotiations are in the works for daugher number three to marry another fundamentalist, patriarchy-obsessed boy.  I don’t know what is happening with my nephew, although he is “courting” a girl in Wisconsin.


    My nieces and nephew are nice kids, but it kills me that they have been raised in such as Christian Fundamentalist ghetto that they lack the interest in delving beyond their very insular up-bringing.  I know that my sister and brother-in-law love their kids, and in many ways, they did a lot of really good things in raising them.  But the indoctrination, especially in regard to the roles that were proper for the girls, just kills me.


    If this is family values, it is a nightmare version of it.  I believe that kids can be raised to be ethical, joyful, and even dutiful, and that non-fear-based religion can certain have a positive influence (even if it’s not my cup of tea), but the extent to which some of these folks control their children is in no way healthy, and I fear that many of these kids grow into adults who lack the resilience to engage in the world outside their Christian ghettos.  That is a real shame — for the kids, and for the rest of society that misses out knowning them.

  • rachael432

    My fiance was homeschooled on a strict Christian curriculum, and then forced to go to a private Christian school. He does believe in Creationism, which we argue about, often. He is extremely well-rounded in certain aspects because he realized the hypocrisy early on, however, there are so many things that I take for granted that are new to him on a regular basis because of the school system he was raised in. I’ve limited his mother’s access to our daughter because she consistently forces her beliefs on everyone. It truly scares me.

  • freetobe

    I used to like the Duggar family because i thought they were a prime example of the perfect loving family  which they somewhat are. However after this past weekend sitting in a house over 100 degrees with no running water,no phone,and no cooling centers to escape too. i thought to myself how damn selfish these people are being to the rest of their human family!

    This world is OVERPOPULATED to the max and we human ARE causing havoc not only to the planet but also to the rest of our fellow beings.  I see it as pure selfishness. For a family that seems to be christian they obviously care nothing for their other brother and sisters. So thanks a lot Duggar crew just keep on breeding yourself and the rest of us into a cruel painful extinction.

    I was lucky enough to be able to affor to rent a hotel room for    the night to cool off. many people could not do that including a whole apartment building of elderly people suffering still in this epic heat wave and an epic storm that lterally came out of nowhere!

    I really cannot stand people like the Duggars now. Selfish selfish selfish! Try thinkng of others for a change like Jesus would have done.

    They need to get those people and other breeders like them off the airwaves. we don’t need anymore of this garbage polluting the earth!

  • coralsea

    This comment is a little off-topic, but I’m going to make it anyway (in my zeal to write about my sister’s family issues, I didn’t think of it at the time).


    Vickie — I so totally loved your discussion of going to the beach or the pool and the way it helps you and other beach/pool goers get past a lot of the insane body issues that so many of us have (including me — I am actually thinking of getting a bathing suit after reading your post).  It really is very liberating to know that one’s body isn’t all that far out of the norm — which, as you so succinctly state, you wouldn’t know if all you saw was airbrushed models.  And the shaming that this can inflict on girls and women as well as the high expectations of boys and men, who in this type of patriarchial setting are already primed to “lead” and dominate (and certainly expressing disappointment in their wives’ apparent imperfections would come naturally in such cases), is an added layer of abuse, as far as I’m concerned.


    I have to say that I enjoy looking at awkardfamilyphotos.com every couple of months for the same reason you like visiting the pool.   Everyone looks silly or awkward sometimes, and there is something endearing about seeing some of those photos.  A sense of humanity, in all of its warmth and odd hairstyles.   My family had a lot of strange quirks — including being fundamentalists, although not to the extent that my sister and brother-in-law have taken it with their kids.  One of them was that my mother was very sensitive about photos, and that everyone in them always has to look good.  Since I am not particularly photogenic, from a tender age I was always directed to “get out of the picture so you won’t spoil it.”  There was a lot more to it than that (my mother detested her younger sister and projected all sorts of evil onto her; I was the second daughter, and she used to encourage my sister to hit me — and then hit me herself — because “nobody likes their little sister.”)


    Anyway, for me, clicking through awkwardfamilyphotos.com has provided some of the feelings of liberation in regard to family photographs that you get at the pool!

  • h2ogirl

    CoralSea – this is off the topic here but I am so sorry your mother had you remove yourself from family photos because you’d spoil them.  That is heartbreaking to me.  No child should hear that from their mother.  

  • h2ogirl

    CoralSea – this is off the topic here but I am so sorry your mother had you remove yourself from family photos because you’d spoil them.  That is heartbreaking to me.  No child should hear that from their mother.  

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