The F Word: Willing to Reconsider

This post is republished in partnership with GRITtv.

OK, so I’ve been a feminist against marriage for as long as I can remember but I will if you will.

Here’s the back story on that.   I have been in love with my partner Elizabeth for 19 years, maybe more.  What’s it mean to be a lesbian? If you’d asked me yesterday I’d have said it was a crazy question. It’s not about "being" something. "It" (in so far as there’s an "it" in the mix,) is about loving someone, another person, in my case, an astonishing woman who flies.

But — and I’m getting to the point — when I read that on the first day of the Proposition 8 Trial, Theodore B. Olson asked his client, "What does it mean to be a lesbian?"  I was struck.  Right there in federal court, Ted Olson asked his client, Kristin M. Perry, “what does it mean to be a lesbian?” And I found myself saying. "Good for Olson." This trial will make history. I mean, I found myself saying it
out loud, and good for Olson’s nothing I’ve ever said before.

In my book, Ted Olson’s the root of no small evil. His argument before the Supremes in Bush vs. Gore stopped the ballot recount in Florida and started the slip-slide into Bushwar.  A leader of the creepy Federalist Society, it was with Olson that what beloved Molly Ivins called the Bushwacking began.

So no, I’m not in the habit of praising Ted Olson. To the contrary, I even had a beef with his wife —  for her role in the anti-feminist, not-very Independent Women’s Forum.

Yet here I am, saying "good for Ted."  And he’s saying yes to David Boies. Eight and a half years after their epic battle over the 2000 election, lawyers Boies and Olson are on the same team challenging the constitutionality of California’s marriage equality ban.

My point is this: I can’t and don’t want to change how I feel about Elizabeth, or marriage, or the stolen election of 2000, but I am willing to reconsider Ted Olson.  It’s taken me a while to get here but here it is. The point: I’m willing to reconsider. Are you?  If I can reconsider Olson, and Olson can team up with Boies, can you out
there, opponents of my equality, listen to Kristen Perry and change your mind about me?

Do I hear you say "I do?"  Oh go on.

The F Word is a regular commentary by Laura
Flanders, the host of GRITtv which broadcasts weekdays on satellite TV
(Dish Network Ch. 9415 Free Speech TV) on cable, and online at and Follow GRITtv
or GRITlaura on


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  • crowepps

    I am willing to reconsider Ted Olson. It’s taken me a while to get here but here it is. The point: I’m willing to reconsider.

    I took Ted Olson a while to get here as well. Maybe he’s grown up.

  • myplanet

    I watch your show everyday on Free Speech TV, Laura. I have thought you were an amazing woman even before I knew you were a lesbian. I always wondered. : ) Now that I know for certain, I salute you as being a wonderful role model for gays and lesbians. I love how you present yourself, you have never denied nor been overtly flamboyant about it, You have just been you. I am willing to reconsider Ted Olson.. but you… I salute and honor.


    Thank you for being.




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