Four Abortion Myths Dispelled


For many years, I was an abortion provider. I owned and ran a clinic near Seattle, Washington, where I provided a range of reproductive healthcare-including abortions-to women, and I've remained active in organizations that support abortion providers across the United States. Over the years, I've heard many myths about abortion that are as pervasive as they are false. Four myths in particular never seem to go away, though any doctor who provides abortions can tell you they just aren't true.

Myth No. 1: Women need waiting periods so they can be sure they really want an abortion.

As if women haven't been agonizing about what they're going to do from the moment they missed their period! As if a woman who happens to be on her way to the grocery store drives past an abortion clinic and says to herself, "Hmm, I think I'll just pop over there and have one!" When a woman visits an abortion clinic, she has already thought long and hard about her decision. Mandatory delays just make it harder for a woman to get an abortion, especially if she needs to take two days off work for an initial appointment and then her procedure.

Myth No. 2: Women use abortion as a method of birth control.

I hear this one so frequently and yet in decades of providing abortion services to more than 30,000 women, I met only two women who used abortion as a birth control method. And they were absolutely right to do so. These two women experienced blood clots while on birth control pills, ectopic pregnancies with the IUD, and they were allergic to latex condoms and spermicide. Using the rhythm method with abortion as backup was the best method for them. I've never met a woman who cavalierly chose abortion as her method of birth control.

Myth No. 3: One abortion is okay, but three or four?

No woman thinks having an abortion is so much fun that she gets pregnant just to have one. The difference between the women who have unintended pregnancies and those who don't is pure luck-not age, education, social status, or intelligence. When women told me they were so ashamed of returning to my clinic for another abortion, I would ask them if they got pregnant on purpose just to have an abortion. It made them laugh, but really, that's the only reason for a woman to feel guilty. Abortion providers do our best to offer a very respectful and comfortable abortion, but they're not anyone's idea of fun.

Myth No. 4: Only irresponsible women need abortions.

We all behave irresponsibly at times. Have you ever driven without a seatbelt on, even for a short distance? Driven after drinking alcohol-even just a little? Smoked a cigarette? Not taken all of the antibiotics your doctor prescribed? These are all irresponsible behaviors, yet most of us have been guilty of at least one. Having unprotected sex is irresponsible, too, but a woman who decides that she is not prepared to be a good mother is behaving responsibly.

Until we have a foolproof, easy-to-use form of birth control-in my opinion, that would be a pill, paid for by insurance, taken only once a year, with absolutely no side effects or adverse reactions, and absolutely no failures — then we cannot condemn women for having unintended pregnancies

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  • lauren-bull

    Hi Dr. Poppema, I met you two years ago when you spoke at Choice USA's Gloria Steinem Leadership Institute in 2006. Your session there was my favorite and I admire you so much for what you have done and continue to do. I remembered how spoke with such honesty and when I saw you had an article on here, I immediately read it. Thank you for sharing your experiences and for explaining why those ridiculous statements are myths, not reality. You're awesome!

  • harry834

    for pointing out the rare cases when a woman does use abortion as birth control, it is justified because her health can't handle normal birth control. I met a friend online who did this. I've heard this argument against women's choice from people as close as one of my relatives. It's an easy conclusion to make – if you have no experience with these things. Thank you for reminding us that women's health needs are different and more complex than what the average schmuk will think.

  • invalid-0

    I am a strong anti abortion advocate. I don’t have a problem with agreeing to all of 4 of the myths you have busted. But the issue is a moral one entirely. I am strongly in the camp that believes that its not a choice, its a child. So these other issues don’t mean much to me.

    I do believe in choice but only before conception. If you want the priviledge of a sexual relationship, accept the consequences. That’s how it’s been since the beginning of time.

    From my point of view, the “choice” is between killing an innocent human being and being incovenienced for 9 months.
    (I’m talking about women who are aborting for reasons outside of rape and medical issues- that is another topic.)

    My two children were adopted. My wife and I were begging to find a child to love, and they are not easy to find. There is a surplus of loving couples who long to have a child to love. Every child can be and should be wanted.

    Here is the question I have for the pro abortion side – When is it a human being and when is it not? Premature babies are surviving as young as 5 months, so I would hope abortionists would at least insist on abortions no longer than 5 months from inception. That might be a temporary compromise both sides could agree to although any abortion would remain a murder in my eyes.

    I believe in obeying the law of the land and I believe in the healthy discussion of this topic, with an open mind. Unfortunately, the laws of this country have forced an unwanted moral position on all of us who believe that murder is occuring in massive numbers each day.

    The gigantic gap between those who believe its a child and those who do not will make this topic never ending or resolvable, I am sure. It will be decided by political will.

    John in Seattle

  • invalid-0

    From my point of view, the “choice” is between killing an innocent human being and being incovenienced for 9 months.

    I often hear pro lifers call the fetus “an innocent human being” and the poor logic drives me nuts. The fetus isn’t sentient and is unable to choose between guilt or innocence. The absence of guilt doesn’t cut it because there is no ability to pick one. And quite the contrary to your opinion, women who abort don’t want to be pregnant.

    I am strongly in the camp that believes that its not a choice, its a child. So these other issues don’t mean much to me.
    I do believe in choice but only before conception. If you want the priviledge of a sexual relationship, accept the consequences. That’s how it’s been since the beginning of time.

    In my opinion, arguing with bumper sticker slogans just doesn’t cut it. It’s not a child, it’s a decision of wether or not to go to term. The second slogan, “accept the consequences” just makes NO sense. Because accepting those consequences doesn’t mean accepting an unwanted pregnancy. Believe it or not, that is how it’s been since (nearly) the beginning of time. Because women have been finding a way to end an unwanted pregnancy wether or not people like you approved.

    Here is the question I have for the pro abortion side – When is it a human being and when is it not?

    Some advice if you want to be taken seriously: we are pro choice, not “pro abortion”. Because pro abortion assumes abortion is the ONLY choice, and we pro choicers aren’t about that. The question itself is quite silly. We know the fetus is human – but personhood – with all it’s attendant rights, is bestowed only at birth.

    Unfortunately, the laws of this country have forced an unwanted moral position on all of us who believe that murder is occuring…

    How was it forced upon people? Those who don’t believe in abortion aren’t being made to have one. It’s a voluntary choice, although abortion can be a medical necessity for some women. An unwanted moral position would be a ban on abortions because forcing pregnant women to unwillingly give birth would be truly immoral.

  • invalid-0

    How can you say that life begins at birth? The DNA is present at fertilization!! I won’t even bring up the HEARTBEAT!! Sounds like you live in lala land. I hope you don’t have children and I hope you never will, since you think so little of the human life. A word of advice — put down the drugs. They are distorting reality for you and making you sound stupid!! Once again, pro-choicer’s sounding like selfish idiots!!

  • harry834

    When a woman is pregnant a decision will be made by somebody whether to terminate the pregnancy or not. Who shall make the decision? The state? The religious pastors? The masses of protestors calling themselves "pro-life"? The Chinese government?

    Here's a weird idea: lets let the decider be the woman who actually has to carry that pregnancy.

    Everyday, women – those not terrorized by restrictive forces – decide which route to go on their pregnancies. Good women have chosen every choice – adoption, abortion, parenting – since choice was possible. And all these women have tried to make the best of their lives in the time after their decision, whatever it was. Why don't you value the personhood of their lives?

  • harry834

    Women also have DNA and heartbeats…and hopes, and goals, and deadlines, and loves, and promises, and fears, and wonder, and,

    well, a life.

    You'd almost think they had thoughts and feelings like a human being. Which is strange because their larger than the five-day fetuses you think have a higher right to personhood than she.

  • invalid-0

    “How can you say that life begins at birth? The DNA is present at fertilization!! I won’t even bring up the HEARTBEAT!!”
    Bah DNA?! Heartbeat?! You honestly expect me to believe that only living human beings have beating hearts and human dna? Really? How about my arm? It has human dna. If you cut it off, it may still be functioning like a um…human arm with human dna…that doesn’t give it any rights after being separated from my body. Well obviously, something with a heartbeat, working lungs, a circulation system, nerves, skin, hair, nails , human blood, and human bones and has completely human dna is a living, human being with full rights to personhood right?

    BAH!

    If you hooked up a lifeless body to a machine and kept the heart going, the lungs pumping and everything working except the brain…it’s quite obviously dead. The ONLY thing that means squat is stuff in a person’s brain if you want to determine if someone is a living human being.

    I’ll tell you what.

    A person without a functioning brain is a person without a soul, since there is no other part of the body that could possibly contain such a thing. However, you should keep in mind that not everyone believes in such a thing as a “soul” or that it really matters if people have them or not. That being said, as a pro-choice person, I can understand banning late abortions that occur under normal circumstances, but the earlier in the pregnancy one gets, the less likely you are to find an actual human person…well I don’t think that you’d find a fetus with a functioning brain before week…22 or so (which is after the vast majority of abortions occur). Now if you can prove that a fetus can think and feel before that period, then maybe you have a reasonable argument of some sort, but I have heard of no such thing. Obviously, if you can prove that a fetus or whatever has a functioning brain capable of feeling emotion and/or processing thoughts at conception, then maybe you have a good case for arguing that “life begins at conception”. Otherwise you’re just being idiotic.

    Sorry I sounded like an activist, but I get annoyed when people use meaningless characteristics to base their anti-choice opinions. After all, I would appreciate solid logical arguments, as would everyone here I hope. After all though, just because something “might” or “probably will” become a human being “at some point” does not mean it has any rights until it is an actual living human being. Now if you’re going to tell me that breathing and having a heartbeat determines if you’re alive or dead, I’d say you’re usually right but not necessarily….if I hook you up to a machine that takes care of those functions while you don’t have a heart or lung that doesn’t make you any less of a human being. However, if your brain is completely shot, I’d have to say that you are dead, even if the rest of your body still works.

    Sorry for the long comment. I just thought I’d share my two cents.

  • invalid-0

    I had an abortion 7 years ago and it was the worst thing I ever did. Let me clear up one myth doctors provide. They do not meet with you- they don’t even look you in the eye-they walk in while your on the table and walk out when they are done- there is no doctor-patient relationship. You cannot understand your “patients” when you have no real time with them. Women need to be protected from abortion, not given access to it. I was lied to as were many other women. I was told it was a blob of tissue- well 2 days after my abortion I passed my fully formed baby and I was 9- 10 1/2 weeks. It’s very sad that people want the right to do these things.

  • invalid-0

    The DNA is present at fertilization!! I won’t even bring up the HEARTBEAT!!

    If life begins at conception, does that mean the sperm and egg are dead? The presence of human DNA, and a heartbeat are irrelevent.
    And I’ll ignore the rest of your post which consists of you projecting your personal opinions of choicers.

  • invalid-0

    that you were treated badly, but you cannot judge all abortion providers by one person who acted like a dork. But I do take issue with your statement “women need to be protected from abortion”. We aren’t children and we don’t need the government making this decision for us.

  • invalid-0

    I just wanted to share with you some of the research I have been doing on abortion for my bioethics class (I am a premed student — will start med school in August).

    around forty days after conception brain waves are detected
    around 7 weeks thumb sucking has been observed

    something has to be working in that tiny little brain to get the thumb to the mouth.

    go to silentscream.org and you can watch the ultra sound view of an abortion of a 12 week fetus. At first you see the fetus sucking his/her thumb and moving slowly and calmly. When the suction tube is inserted (before it even punctures the sac holding the fetus) the small life starts moving like crazy — jerky movements — the heart rate of the fetus increased dramatically.

    if the tiny litte brain wasnt working then why would he/she react to a stimulus invading his/her once very calm space?

    responses to this is most welcome — I have to develop class discussion questions to debate wether or not abortion is ethical and if so under what conditions.

    thank you

  • invalid-0

    How do you know it’s real? It sounds like a biased site, so how do you know its valid? Besides, I don’t know a woman who would get pregnant just to tape a abortion.

  • invalid-0

    anonymous who has mentioned this pro life website at least twice already? Is it a site you created? Third question: is it connected with that infamous fakeumentary “Silent Scream”?

  • invalid-0

    I have never posted before this. I dont consider my self pro-life or pro-choice. I believe there are situations in which an abortion is necessary but most times it is done I believe it is most likely unethical — that is if the fetus’ brain is working and it has such a reaction and can feel pain.

    most times it is done being — about 75% of abortions done at 9-10 weeks

    No it is not a site I have created — I will check into the 3rd question .. which is a very good question thank you

  • invalid-0

    This is a fabulous and much-needed article. It’s wonderful to see that someone is actually paying attention to the truths of women and abortion. However, some of the comments that followed are just insane.

    “If you want the privilege of a sexual relationship, accept the consequences.”

    I take issue with many of these statements people have made here but this is appalling!! Since when should a child be considered a consequence??!!! The act of bringing new life into this world and raising a child is the highest privilege and should never be considered a consequence! A person should never be forced to have a child when they are not ready to take on the responsibility 110%. The right to have a child, not the right to abort, should really be the issue of discussion. There are too many people who do not take the privilege of parenting, of raising, nurturing and teaching a child, seriously or responsibly. With all the neglect and abuse of children in this country, it’s time we start focusing on the children that are here, right now. What is with all the people who care more about the unborn rather than with the children here whose parents pay them no attention, certainly do not teach them, may even physically, emotionally, mentally or sexually abuse them? Do something to help the lives of these children so that they may have a chance.

    And stop acting as if adoption is such an easy answer because (1) sadly, there continues to be a HUGE stigma associated with adoption in this country and (2)the adoption process need a serious makeover. Many laws heavily favor the birth parents and many potential adoptive parents have had their hearts broken with having an adoption finalized and then finding themselves embattled in the court system because the birth parent(s) decided after birth to change their minds. Not an easy thing to go through once, and just devastating to have to go through twice. But it happens and is extremely discouraging to many would-be adoptive parents.

    And most of all, stop treating women as if their lives have no meaning or significance! Their lives matter!

  • invalid-0

    media circuses that resulted from the birth parents changing their minds months after the adoption was finalized. In one of the more publicized cases, the birth dad later walked out on his family. Guess he was bored with parenting.

  • invalid-0

    Another “anonymous” mentioned this site twice before – thought it was a same one.

  • invalid-0

    so i looked up the validity of the silent scream thing i viewed. the guy who made it was an ex-abortionist. it was really of an abortion — in which the woman probably didnt consent to it being tape (i read today in my bioethics book that they use to conduct research on aborted fetus’ without the woman’s consent) — any who — on the plan parenthood website they claimed about every thing the guy said to be false.– and of course the bias was in the other direction. i need to find a non bias site on abortion — dont know if that exists.
    But going back to reading my ethics book — i was disturbed about a research study they did on aborted fetus’ in 1973 — researchers were trying to develop an artificial placenta so they obtained 8 fetuses by hysterotomy weighting between 300 to 600 grams. they took the largest of them and place him/her in a warm saline solution that was supposed to mimic the amniotic sac, it grasped frantically and moved its limbs as it died. —

  • invalid-0

    i do agree with you on most of your statements.
    I believe we need better sex education in our schools. And it needs to start in middle school. my high school taught abstinence — ha we all know how well that works — we had the highest teen pregnancy rate of any of the surrounding schools!
    I think the responsibilities of parenting should be mixed in with the sex ed class also. we do have lots of shitty parents in this world — some people just should be parents– we need better protective services for children.
    And no getting pregnant should never be a consequence of sex! Having a baby is such a beautiful amazing thing — I have a 8 month old son–
    But if you are not capable of handling parenthood than i think it is your duty to use birth control! The chose to choose should come before you have sex not when you are pregnant — (unless your life is put at risk from a complication of the pregnancy or you were raped)

  • invalid-0

    First I would just like to say I am neither pro-life or pro-choice. I am in a medical bioethics class and am doing research on the topic to write a paper. The question we are concerned with in my class is : Is abortion ethical? Under what conditions? (I am a premed and will start med school in August)

    Your Comment: I often hear pro lifers call the fetus “an innocent human being” and the poor logic drives me nuts. The fetus isn’t sentient and is unable to choose between guilt or innocence. The absence of guilt doesn’t cut it because there is no ability to pick one. And quite the contrary to your opinion, women who abort don’t want to be pregnant.

    This may not be poor logic:

    1. You argue,”the fetus isnt sentient”
    From the dictionary: Sentience refers to possession of sensory organs, the ability to feel or perceive, not necessarily including the faculty of self-awareness.
    –in case you didnt know fetus’ have this capability–
    doctors/researchers agree that the fetus can feel pain by 20 weeks and quite possibly before this time. Killing a living being that can feel pain I think and most would agree is unethical.

    2. You say “the fetus is unable to choose between guilt or innocence” therefore telling the pro-lifers they cant argue innocent human being. Well, a new born baby and probably up till around a year in age ALSO cannot choose between guilt or innocence. They are only innocent b/c ability to feel guilty is taught to them over time usually by being punished. (thank you psychology class) ex: if you are taught stealing is ok and you are never punished for doing it then you will never feel guilty about stealing. So your statement doesnt logically hold unless you feel you are not a human being until around age 1!?

    3. you said, “women who abort don’t want to be pregnant” this is not always true(always exceptions). Some woman do want to be pregnant — some woman have to abort or risk dying themselves (ectopic pregnancy) and these woman may have been trying to have a baby (ie wanting to be pregnant:) Also, I have read many stories of young girls that have become pregnant and they tell their boyfriend who they believe is so in love with them — things change after that — most of the time the boyfriend talks the girl into having an abortion, making the girl feel she has no other way, and most times left her feeling extremely guilty about the abortion — and of course the boyfriend no longer wants anything to do with the girl after that.
    Now of course your right many woman just dont want to be preggo but there are exceptions!

  • invalid-0

    Why were you bringing up a pro life website?

    1. You argue,”the fetus isnt sentient”
    From the dictionary: Sentience refers to possession of sensory organs, the ability to feel or perceive, not necessarily including the faculty of self-awareness.
    –in case you didnt know fetus’ have this capability–
    doctors/researchers agree that the fetus can feel pain by 20 weeks and quite possibly before this time. Killing a living being that can feel pain I think and most would agree is unethical

    I went to dictionary.com and that is where I got my definition. The medical consensus I’ve found online says 22 weeks, and not before. Plus, most early term abortions are performed many weeks earlier than that. I’m not sure which researchers you are quoting, do you have a source?

    Well, a new born baby and probably up till around a year in age ALSO cannot choose between guilt or innocence. They are only innocent b/c ability to feel guilty is taught to them over time usually by being punished.

    I still feel my point is valid. It gets more into the term of philosophy than the legality or illegality of abortion.

    you said, “women who abort don’t want to be pregnant” this is not always true(always exceptions). Some woman do want to be pregnant

    My bad. I should have added a qualifier: “Most” women who abort don’t want to be pregnant. Some are compelled if the fetus dies or a doctor finds it has a fatal defect. In the case of the hypothetical girl who gets pregnant to hang on to a boy, well sometimes they feel bad after going to term. It’s a lose-lose situation.

  • invalid-0

    The chose to choose should come before you have sex not when you are pregnant

    That suggests a woman should just accept her pregnancy and give birth to an unwanted child. I don’t buy that. I can’t come up with the words to explain why, but I just don’t. Maybe because it sounds so patronizing.

  • invalid-0

    in an abortion chat room on yahoo years ago. One of the pro choice regs said the makers of “Silent Scream” later admitted they faked it. A URL to the admission was posted, but I neglected to write it down. Perhaps a web search will find it. But I have found web searches are only as good as the words you plug in to the search engine.

  • invalid-0

    well if the woman doesnt want a child or to be pregnant than how hard is it to use birth control — there are a plethora of options now– therefore avoiding the expense of an abortion and in some cases the guilt that comes afterward — wouldnt that be ideal!

  • harry834

    The access to contraception is much harder for

     

    Poor women, women in rural areas, women with religious husbands, teen women, women in abusive relationships, women who weren't taught the difference between consent and coersion in school, women who were fed abstinence-only lies in school, women who are undocumented immigrants, women who are lesbian or questioning, women of color, women in prison, women in religious communities, women whose family is unsympathetic,…

  • harry834

    when we tell the lie that emergency contraception is the same as abortion, the women who believe that are in hard straights as well

  • invalid-0

    i agree emergency contraceptive is not abortion and woman need to know these things. as to the post above — I dont know how it would be done .. but wouldn’t it be nice to educate all those woman you listed off about contraceptives and the ability to avoid abortion all together.

  • harry834

    As my old boss would say, "education, education, education" :)

    Though of course, there are barriers to education, and those barriers are put up, either intentionally or unintentionally, by people and society. When undocumented women can't access health care because the many people in all states – red AND blue – won't "pay for illegals" then these women simply won't go to the doctor and they certainly can't have the open dialogue between patient and doctor that allows such education to happen.

    And that's just one of those groups of women.

    In addition to education access, we must have access to the contraceptives themselves. This access also faces barrier imposed by people. Even though the FDA has allowed over-the-counter access to EC for women over 18, the pharmacists still find a way to block that by refusing to stock it, by keeping it on a shelf such that it needs to be asked for. And lawmakers and our fellow citizens will defend these pharmacists for "defending their conscience".

    Moreover, the FDA panel that originally found EC acceptable for over-the-counter, found that was good for women of all ages. But after two years of refusing women anything, they decided to give it, but only to women 18 and over. There was no reason for this distinction accept to please the fears of people who are uneducated at best, and hostile at worst.

    Advocates for Youth, will say as much.

    As you read the above words, you will see a lot of negativity towards the people who place barriers. And I feel the criticism and anger has its due. But I also feel its worth knowing that these people are our fellow citizens, and much of the time aren't intending to be oppressive. I think that some can be viewed as intentionally bad, but I'm less confident in judging motives. In any case, it largely doesn't matter, because even if actions are unintentional, those people are still responsible for doing them. And by "those people", I also mean myself, you, and us. And inaction is a form of action.

    So while I want advocates to venture out with some compassion for those who disagree with us, I also understand that our job is to challenge their faulty thoughts, and not to shy away from making them, or ourselves, uncomfortable.

     

  • invalid-0

    Reading this made me really happy, so thank you.

    Regarding some of the above discussion, the only thing I want to say is that when life begins is a completely personal judgement. No matter how strong your feelings are on the matter either way, you can’t change someone else’s mind. To me, what exists in the first trimester is nowhere near personhood. Arguing about heartbeats won’t change my view – lots of things have heartbeats and we kill them anyway. Demonstrating personhood requires more than that. It’s up to the individual woman to decide what constitutes personhood and act on her own moral compass because cultural consensus is just not possible.

  • invalid-0

    on your first point — i apologize for not putting the site i found that info on. i am not pro-life. i will admit though i do not know if those doctors were pro-life or not. i am trying to find that site again but right now am not having any luck. i do have a question for you though. Say your right and the fetus feels pain at 22 weeks, is it ethical then? But more over are we defining personhood by ability to feel pain? I mean a person in a coma with a good chance of coming out of it is definitely a person even though they cant feel pain at the moment and should not be denied their right to life.

    oh i got my definition of google dictionary

    i dont really understand how you think your ” choosing between guilt or innocence defines personhood” is philosophical in any manner. my bioethics class is a philosophy class and well explain cause as far as I am concerned I proved you principle wrong

    I am not pro-life because women who are raped do not deserve to carry an undue burden. They did not make the chose to have sex someone else made it for them. Also, I believe in Plan B.
    But I am not pro-choice either. I think the choosing should come before sex. There are many forms of birth control people just need to be better educated. And i think birth control should be free and accessible to all those who cant afford it or who dont want their parents finding out they are sexually active.

  • invalid-0

    between a person in a coma and a 6 week old fetus. Protecting the former (to paraphrase Harry834) doesn’t require government intervention into a woman’s personal life and decisions. The media circus around(for example) Terri Schiavo, and the government’s attempt at unconstititional intervention were just shameful.
    As regards the guilt or innocence question, I didn’t mean it to define personhood, I merely had issue with the description of an early term fetus as an “innocent baby”. It’s a form of emotional manipulation, IMHO.

  • invalid-0

    Having an abortion was the hardest decision I ever made. It was also the best choice for me, and while it wasn’t easy I would do it over again.

    I spent time with a counselor before hand. I was given other options. I was asked – repeatedly – if I was sure, because I didn’t have to do it. Before the procedure, the doctor put down everything, held my hand, and asked me if I was sure. I was asked if anyone was pressuring me. The people in that office were the most caring health care professionals I’ve ever met, and they have my undying gratitude.

    Unfortunately, people like you have stigmatized abortion to the point that those of use who made a choice and made peace with it are afraid to speak up. We’re afraid for our jobs, our families (because most women who have abortions DO have families), our pets, our lives.

    So you chose abortion and it’s been hard for you. That’s sad, and I hope you find peace. But stop and remember *why* you chose the way you did. The circumstances. The desperation. The reasons you decided to abort rather than carry to term. If you can do that – *honestly* – and still say other women should not be allowed to make the same choice you did, then quite frankly you scare me.

  • invalid-0

    you can do so anonymously at http://www.imnotsorry.net. At this date, it’s the only site I know of where women who weren’t hurt by their abortions can speak of their expereince.